Winter
by Hymir
Summary: Have you ever wondered how memories can change our lives? Have you ever been under the cleansing rain, or under the pure snow? Have you ever lost the one you love? Have you ever killed a friend? Have you ever loved? [NaruSaku] [JiraTsuna]
1. Memories

Hymir's note: I would like to thank those people who made me finish writing this story (or at least the first chapter), as my inspiration, as my support and as my colleagues. Those people are:

--- DaaNi-ChAn (One supportive new-found friend, which I want to special thank, and say… Thanks a lot, thanks a lot)

--- Miss Soupy (The first inspiration for me to write a Fic, though this story is not similar to hers, but still, I want to thank her, for fueling my desire to write, thanks)

--- Subaku no Paine (The story that made me continue writing when I was stuck, is one owned by this amazing writer, thank you for the inspiration)

--- silentknight021 (his story made me finish this first chapter, and made me start the second, thanks again for the inspiration)

--- Aya K (whose story gave me the whole idea for writing this one, and for writing it the way it should be, thanks a lot, muchísimas gracias)

--- Nes Mikel (whose story is rather interesting, and inspiring, and I felt I should thank him for the inspiration of sorts, thank you very much)

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto (I know, the prefabricated standard disclaimer, but I couldn't come out with a better one, really, but later, I will come out with one of my own).

So, being this told, let's go on, into the story.

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-Chapter One- _"Memories"_

Light... it is what we seek everytime we get caught in-between shadows, hopeful of being able to even see for once in our lives someday, it is what every single man longs for, in those times of despair, when skies seem darker than darkness itself; when colors start seeming dull, when food looses it's taste, when we start to ask; is unendingly painful the correct way to describe this void-like feeling that crawls up the spine? or it is just an excuse not to walk out of it, for we know we need it to even stay awake, to fuel the desire of living, even if it's just for destroying it, for existence at this moment seems not to have a point. Why is this feeling invading my very heart? What is it? Does it have a meaning? Am I supposed to hold to this feeling? To embrace it, even fight for it like if it was a drug of sorts? Thinking I need emotions like these to survive, to remain sane, to just not forget what made me feel this way? Am I really seeking for light? Or is it darkness what I truly desire?

Alone... it is what I am now, it is what I feel now, just like in the very beginning, when I was only a child, hated by mostly all the people in the world, or at least being forced to think like that, by the means of their actions, all of their actions towards me, as if I was some kind of monster, calling me freak, beating me up every single, unendingly passing day, and seeming not to find it boring as they found new ways to "entertain" themselves in the daily beating. But I kept wondering "_Why"_; soon I earned the answer, well… kind of; in the middle of a beating, when I was around 6 years old, I found myself crying out loud the question, doing it as some kind of reaction to the anonymous bullies, and then I saw one of them flinching to my interrogant, seeming almost shocked to the fact that I was able to think, and was even able to talk, not just to scream in pain, but to actually articulate words. That's when I received my answer from him: _"Because you're a fucking demon, brat"_.

Letting my brains and my soul to process that information, the thug just walked away, dragging the others with him, into the darkness of a lonely alley, leaving also a lonely boy flinched on the cold ground of the streets, alone with his thoughts and with the other "companions" that often came after a beating, like odd-looking bugs, urchin-like furred rats, hungry, stray dogs looking for some unlucky animal to feast upon, looking at every single living being their eyes caught with a frightening and even demonic glare; but the child was scared of them no more, for he have begged them to finish with his suffering by simply sinking their fangs into the boy's jugular veins and ending with everything, with a life of pain and suffering, but even they seemed to hate him enough not to comply with this request, that was made mostly every day, mostly every night, mostly in every dark alley that the village has. Tonight remembers me of that day because of one thing… tonight is also raining.

Although almost of my early childhood memories are alike, and by that meaning everyday beatings, insults and cold glares, some memories are happy though, in one devious way, I think. This "happy" memories are, nevertheless, derived from or consequential of beatings, as I can recall, in fact, the first happy memory I have fits exactly when the daily beatings start to be less often, and in time, they just stop happening. It was a cold winter, the wind blowing hard, most establishments were merely closed for the fact that it was extremely cold outside, but still, a beating was taking place, it was the only thing that not even God could stop from happening, a daily ritual that could not wait until the sun was out again; there I found myself being kicked and punched, lying on the snow, until I heard a voice, a whisper-like soft, smooth voice coming from afar, telling the bullies to knock it off, to stop the beating. The one thing I can recall after hearing the voice, was seeing a girl coming.

Exactly in the moment I heard that beautiful voice, I fainted, knowing that I would be safe from that moment on, I didn't know why, but I felt it that way, letting the snow layer over the frosted grass embrace me afterwards. Seconds later, I awoke, feeling warmer than before, finding that someone have just covered my near-to-frozen body with a warm, pink, winter jacket; then I heard the voice again, it was a sweet voice, that asked me _"Are you okay?"_, but I couldn't answer, not after what I saw, and that was that the lovely voice have came out of an even more beautiful girl, I couldn't believe it, I was saved by a Goddess, a pink-haired one.

Doubting that I have heard that question, she asked again _"Are you okay?"_, but this time I somehow managed to spit some words out of my mouth, but just not exactly the ones she was looking for, instead I answered with another question… _"What's your name?"_, in that moment, that question seemed to make perfect sense, for it was the first time that someone that was not the _Old one_, have saved me from the bullies, and I needed to know the name of my savior, the name inside that pink-haired, strawberry-smelling, velvet-like skin, six year old angel that had surely fell from the sky, for I found no other explanation to her presence exactly in that park, at that exact hour of the day, and to stop the beating that I was receiving. When I reacted finally, I felt a slight blush on my cheeks that was just rather a good sensation, but not one I have felt before, but an entirely new sensation that I could not comprehend… yet; after that I managed to answer to the first thing she have asked me _"Uh, I guess, thank you… for stopping the bullies that stole my clothing"_, in that moment, I saw something that I'll never forget, not in a lifetime… She was blushing, her cheeks had gone ruby red, her emerald eyes went half-closed, looking at me while saying _"Anytime… by the way, I'm…"_

Long was the wait to know the name of my angel, and seconds afterwards had gone even longer, but when she was about to tell her name, she got interrupted by a voice that called _"Sakura, darling let's go home"_, and so she replied _"__Hai__ mom, I'm coming"_, I was shocked, her name was gorgeous… _"Sakura-__chan__"_.

Clearly I remember that in the exact same moment that her mom called her, snowflakes started falling all over us, all over the village, and I just saw everything going in slow-motion, her gracious smile thrown at me, while running towards her mom and waving to me in a fashion that meant _Good bye_, the smooth movement of her utterly beautiful self making herself a path between the marble-white snow-filled meadow of the park, her pink bangs shaking rhythmically imitating the falling of decidual foliage in the autumn wind, her pink-furred snow boots moving up and down, but always forward, everything. That's when it hit me, the meaning of this all, the meaning of these feelings, that's when it all made perfect sense, when all the pieces started to pull themselves together, forming one single image, that dug into the depths of my self and stayed there; even now, the image still warms my heart, it is her image, smiling, that made me realize… That I had fallen in love.

Maybe, that is my childhood's happiest memory, and as I remarked before, from that day on, the beatings started to "fade out" until they disappeared one day, into my memories, where they remain torturing me sometimes, but when they do, there comes that image, the one of the pink-haired angel, to wipe out those awful emotions, to warm my heart, to make me fall for her again, and again. When I despair, she gives me hope, when I'm confused, she clears my mind, when I feel I'm nothing, she makes me feel I'm everything in the entire world; that is the way she has made me feel since that glorious day, the day our eyes crossed for the very first time, the day I gave her my soul , in exchange for a simple thing to value, in order to give life another chance, the day I first had a dream, other than being the highest ranked shinobi of the village, the day I got the dream I cherish the most, the dream I keep as my most valuable possession, the one that gives me the strength to go after anything that I fix myself upon, the one that made me realize that the things that really matter, are the ones that are immaterial, things you may not be able to see with your eyes, but with your heart instead. And my dream is … to protect and to love my sweet pink-haired angel for as long as there is a hint of life inside me.

That time, it was snowing, it was winter; maybe that's why I like this season so much, it's because of her, because of the gift she gave to me, because of the snow under my feet is as pure as the feelings I have for her, is as pure as her soul. On that moment it was winter, as so as in this moment.

Years have passed since that happened, yet it looks so vivid even today. But is there a reason for me to remember those exact memories at this precise moment?

Years from now, I'll still remember those moments just as if they have happened only moments ago, because, if things go wrong just as they've been predicted, I'll be out of the village forever, and I'll never go back, for I will not be able to look at their faces once again, not once, and in fear of that, I need to keep my memories intact.

Now I know why; now I can answer myself that question, the answer to _Why?_, and that answer is because I only bring suffering and despair to those around me, even out of the village, I only bring destruction and sadness to those who have contact with me, to those unfortunate enough to bump into me, but another question comes out seeming paradoxical to the first one, but is still the same question _Why, why do they accept me, knowing the sadness I will bring them, and why does she love me?_

Reasoning that question or at least trying to, seems futile, for I see no reason why they should feel the way they do about me, and not the way the bullies did in the past, endless questions now burst into my head, questions about how did I make friends, how I kept them, how did I earn the respect of so many people, how did _She _fall for me, just as I fell for her, and finally, how did this happen? But there is no time to time for this, seeing the situation around me, it is. The chain of events that lead us here in the first place. The truth is that I don't want to remember why am I here, why am I thinking this, but the thing is, that if I do forget it, I will not get back those green eyes that have kept me up so many nights, that pink hair that makes me feel I'm smelling a piece of heaven, that body that has been sculpted by God himself, the intense look of her eyes when She sees me (even though it's a killer glare sometimes, provoked by some stupid thing I did or said), and finally, that soul, that essence, a quintessence strong enough to keep me alive, the one that revived me that day, the one I swore I would fight for, the one I swore to protect, the one I swore to love; maintaining this promise is my top priority right now… no, scratch that, it's always been and will always be my top priority, my job, my goal in life, and nothing, nothing on this world will change my mind out of that, or convince me otherwise, I will not let that happen. But what I wonder about right now is, about _that guy's _words, his statements about the future, how was he so sure that what he said would happen, how could he predict the future with such confidence, how? How, God dammit, how?

"_Eternal slumber awaits the one you love, for this is the destiny predicted to her, in case you try to stop us, that is. For I can feel you, your demon's essence, __now active, as I speak, growing out of anger to the words you hear coming out of my mouth, as they feel like knives ripping out your insides, don't they?"_

"_Leave now, and you will guarantee this girl's safety, leave for good, and I swear I will not harm her, nor do anything to her" _Those were his words trying to assure his own safety, trying to blackmail me with Her life and safety, how low, how vile, but I could only comply, out of fear that he could harm her. That bastard.

Exactly at the time he was about to go away, I managed to say something, that in-between growlings, was understandable. _"You will go, for harm her is the last __thing I want, the last thing that I could possibly do to her, __but before you go, mark my words in your head, If you harm her in the most minimum way, I will __extract personally those fucking eyes of yours; and if you do something to her, such as touching even one hair of her head, you will regret you were born, __rat, for I will torture in ways you couldn't imagine possible__, and that I swear."_ I managed to tell him that, as a pair of red, slitted eyes met a pair of red eyes with notable black markings on them, eyes that I once recognized as my best friend's… no, my brother's eyes. Eyes of a person I once promised I would rescue from the insides of darkness, darkness that I once knew, darkness that I was once inside of; and there were times when I really thought I could, times when I was sure I would drag him out of that suffering and bring him to live once again with us, with all of us, times when I really thought possible that things would be the same as before if the act of getting him back turned things as they used to be, haha, as if; I was dumb enough to think that I could save him from that darkness, but I just didn't see what he did, he entered himself into that darkness, it was his decision, his own choice, his way to be himself. I was so dumb, I was so foolish, I was so blind, I was so naive.

No, it wasn't that I just would let them go, let him go, no, this wouldn't finish that easy, for I'd rather die than spend another minute apart from my pink-haired goddess, or over that, to leave her with them, to those black-robed bastards who wanted me, or the demon inside me, the one I've got to consider a part of me as my own soul.

Sounds to me that the only thing to do next is to look for them, those red moon freaks, the Akatsuki. The same organization where that snake fiend was, Orochimaru, is also the same organization that had that Uchiha Itachi guy under their lines, I mean, before _He_ killed him, before Sasuke killed him, in one blood stained battle, in the exact same time when I last saw him (before this), in the last chance that I got to bring him back, yes, I can recall… _"Sasuke, you finally … you finally finished this __nonsensical quest of yours, but is it worth it, all the killing, your comrades being dead, your brother being dead like this, is it worth it? Don't you regret this __things?"_, I said, when he abruptly answered _"Yes, and no. Yes, I finally finished this quest, and no, I don't regret things, the only thing I regret is lost the one, __only thing that I had left__, that you stole it from me, but otherwise, it was worth it, for I have found a new goal in life, to kill you, and that monster of yours"._

Frozen I was, when I heard those words coming out of his mouth… _"What, I stole that thing from you?, What could it possibly be, when did I do something so __rotten to you?"_ I managed to say, sobbing and trembling. _"My other goal in life, you killed it, you killed HER"_ That's when it came to me, my eyes widened as I started to cry, no capable of speaking anymore, just mumbling words when Her image came to me, that woman, the one with the glasses, the one _I killed_, taken over by an assassin rage, only because she lied to me, in order to meet the demon within me, but her lie, I could not bear, she told me… that she had killed Sakura.

"_Curses! I was so naive, that I ate it up, that I believed her lies, what did I do, what have I done?"_ Those were the only understandable words that I was able to elaborate from the bottom of my mouth, when he screamed _"She lied, of course, but that doesn't mean you had the right to kill her, you didn't had the fucking __right to kill my wife, nor my unborn child"_ I froze, I couldn't… couldn't speak, nor move, I could only cry, silently, because what I just heard shocked me, _How I __could do something that awful, not only I killed one of his teammates, I killed his wife, and his child in the process, I should've foreseen this, or at least take __a hint of it, of how close were them, the looks he threw to __her, the almost palpable feeling floating on the atmosphere around them, it was… love. And I, I…_

_D__estroyed it._ In that moment, the moment I realized that I have destroyed his life, I felt like being torned apart, felt like my insides were shredding themselves, then, his eyes shot a killing glare to me, I was heartbroken again, and I could do nothing but watch him leave, I was not the person to ask him to return to Konohagakure.

Turning his back on me, before leaving, he said something, something that still echoes on my head today _"Naruto, have a good, peaceful life… while you can, for __I, will come back and destroy you some day, and no matter what happens, or how hard you train, you will no be able to survive my wrath…__ dear brother."_

Done this, he left, leaving just a man, an eighteen year-old man, crying his heart out for what he had done that day, that infamous day. I cried, out of despair, thinking of every possibility to mend my actions, but, I always reached the same conclusion, and that was that I could do nothing but regret, and promise that woman, I think her name was… _Karin_, yes, promise Karin and her unborn child to do whatever was in my hands to fix his life, or at least try to do it. So I went back to the place where I tore her life apart… literally, because I killed her in a horrible way, and the image came to my head as I saw her, lying on the ground, with a fading smile and a pair of reaped glasses beside her. I remembered _"So, I killed your precious pink-haired bitch, and oh you should have seen her screaming and crying when I ripped __out her __bleeding hear and…t" as_ I interrupted _"Silence, shut up!!! I-I w-will k-kill you, and I will reap your heart out so you will see it with your own eyes."_

Driven me to insanity, that's what she did, that's what she intended. The next thing I knew is that everything turned red, and when I found myself conscious again, the earth was moving around me, trying to engulf me, but suddenly, it stopped. I found myself grabbing her by the neck with one hand, and with the other one inside her.

More than a look of pain, her look was one of terror, as she saw my arm inside her chest, and my hand grabbing her heart. She was spitting blood, as I made my way into her chest, she said a word I couldn't recognize until the moment I returned to bury her, she tried to say _Sasuke-k…_ but I reaped her heart before she could finish.

Burying her was such a painful thing to do, for I knew that I was burying Sasuke's life with her. As I finished burying her, I gave a look at the surroundings, and saw it, reaped away from her, her heart, lying on the ground, covered with blood and burned by the fox's chakra. I just stared at it, and felt a sole tear streaming down, as…

I picked her heart and buried it along with the body, for I could do nothing else, not anymore. After that, I heard steps and voices, voices of my friends and above all, a light, softened, yet concerned voice, it was her voice, my cherry blossom's voice, echoing in that maze, calling out my name, almost crying as I wasn't replying, then I let out a whisper _"I'm here"_, afterwards, I heard Kakashi-sensei's voice yelling _"I heard him, follow me"_ and soon I was surrounded by my friends and comrades, and by a concerned pink-haired eighteen year-old woman, who asked _"Naruto, are you okay?"_ It was obvious that I wasn't, but I could only reply the opposite.

Eventually, I told them what happened, and they only answer, the only conclusion was… that I was not wrong on doing what I did, that it was comprehendible, even logical. The really thought that, even when I didn't. And so, years passed, or precisely, five years, when it happened. Sasuke joined the Akatsuki, and abducted Her.

So I… cannot simply stand here remembering things, I have to find her, and him as well, in order to keep my promise to Sakura, and my promise to Karin as well, the only thing I hope, is that I'm not too late, and for their own sake, that She's not harmed in any way, because if she is, I will make them regret. "Huh, the rain stopped, little snowflakes now are falling down from the sky. I feel this is going to be one long night, please Sakura, my love wait for me, I'm going to get you back, jut wait."

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So, did you like the first chapter of _Winter_, guys? I hope you found it interesting, and I hope you review it, because that would make me publish (and finish, by the way), the second chapter, that's already at the 20 percent done.

So please review, so I can keep on writing this Fic that once came to my mind, and it's finally materializing, may I add, this is the first Fic I publish and it would do so much for me if you comment it (please, avoid flames if possible, but constructive criticism I accept gladly).

And for the record, this Fic is damn hard to write for I have left a song hidden in it, I someone finds it and tell what song is it, I will be amazed, and will mention your name (or pen name) on the next chapter, that, by the way, will be called… well, I'll let you know when it comes out. R&R. Peace.

Note: The song part it's going to be almost impossible, so you need to be extremely clever to know what song is, and as a hint I will tell you, that is in Spanish, so, there you are, from now on, you're on your own.


	2. Inner self, Outer self

OK, my dear readers, this is chapter two of the story, I'm glad that some of you reviewed, and so may of you hit on this humble fic. Just so you know, I'm terribly sorry about the fact that I'm a late updater, to be true to you, my inspiration comes like… once a week, and about like 5 a.m. So it is quite difficult to write in those conditions (I think some of you do the same, in fact, I'm sure that a lot of us suffer from this "Fanfic/Fanart Inspiration Syndrome" or FIS as I call it. Ok, I just came up with that, but it is better than to say all those conditions every time we update, or write a new story, or draw fanart, so if you like the term, use it).

By the way, if you feel a little confused on the How-to-read (that I hope not), here it is, how is it read:

- "Talking"

- "_Talking in the past"_

_- Thinking (past and present)_

But before starting, I want to thank someone:

- And I want to thank Shiroihato as well, I want to tell you that your story is awesome, and I'm glad that a fellow writer (whose story I really enjoy) has a good opinion on my fic, thanks so much.

- Also, I want to thank Veritas15, thanks so much for the review.

And last but not least, I want to Special thank someone:

- This chapter is dedicated to E-vay, a flower that blossomed beautifully in this little planet, keep up the excellent work, you're a magnificent artist, I hope you enjoy this chapter as well as the first one, and thanks for the beautiful comment. This one's for you, girl.

So, with nothing left to say, hope you like this chapter.

Disclaimer: (I finally found one good enough, haha.) I donnot own Naruto, but I the other night I found a black notebook laying on the ground, as rain fell; it had white letters on it as some sort of title, it said "Death Note", after I got home, I phoned Mr. Kishimoto and told him to make the Manga a NaruSaku, and if not, he would suffer from the consequences of tempting fate. So, I still don't own Naruto, but I own a killer notebook (hehe, just kidding).

From this chapter on, I will put a chapter summary, so you can start guessing what will the chapter is going to contain, but as in the main summary, it will be a question summary. Have fun. Also, in order not to be "all angst", this chapter will have some laughs (some evil smirks, some joking grins) to ease a little bit the tension, and will contain high levels of fluffiness.

_**Chapter Two: **__**Inner Self, Outer Self**_

_**Have you ever doubted? Have you ever been saved by yourself**__**? Have you ever found light between the darkness? Have you ever taken chances and risked everything? Have you ever realized the miracle life IS?**_

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-Chapter Two- _"Inner Self, Outer Self" _

Silence, absolute silence; as I wake up, I wonder _Where am I?, How could I possibly get here?_, when I see a shadow, the figure of a man, of someone strangely familiar that entered to the room where I am. Darkness surround us, and his silhouette is only lit by the light coming in from the hall outside this humid, darkened, gloomy room.

Clear is not a word that I would use to describe my vision right now, but that image, that silhouette, that glare; I swear I have seen them before, but where?. He just looks at me, expectantly, standing by the door. I can feel how heavy his look is, and somehow, I have felt it before, that glare, filled with hatred, it is so heavy that I start feeling empty, hopeless and sad; as I receive that glare I just want to cry. Then it hits me, I finally know who is standing there, I can finally recall who owns that glare. "Sasuke…"

Exactly as I finish to say his name, I can clearly see that he twitches, and then his eyes turn into a pair of reddened orbs with marks carved in them as black flames, and in a low-toned, but still deep voice, he says "Indeed". "Tell me, why am I here, what do you want from me?" I reply, as he says "Don't worry, I mean you no harm… yet".

Cornering himself inside the room, he continues "If you want to know the reason why I brought you here, you may ask yourself, and with that sharp mind of yours, within instants you should know the answer". I feel a little bit confused about what he said, but after thinking for a few seconds, I reach a conclusion "Blackmail, isn't?" He starts laughing in amusement, and crossing his arms, he says "As sharp as always, but I'm afraid this is a little more complicated than that. I brought you here not just to use you only as bait, but for a… bigger purpose" "Vengeance?" I interrupt him, as he says "Call it whatever you want, as for me, I'd rather call it… payback".

"You know he will not fall that easy with something like that, do you?" I tried to sound convincing about my words, even though I didn't believe them. He laughed "As if…"

Quivering… I found myself, as I realized I was too exhausted to even stay awake; and he noticed, in fact, he was counting on it. "Don't you worry, you're are simply going under through the weakening effect of a drug I administered on you, so sleep for the time being". "Bastard… what kind of drug did you put into my system?" I angrily said; eyes were closing due to the effect of that 'guy's' drug. He laughed, something I was starting to hate already, as he said "Something to keep you… 'tamed', controlled".

My head started to spin round around the room, as I tried to stay aware (and awake), in order to fight back the substance that was in me, but soon I found out, angrily, that any kind of resistance was futile, and that the only thing left to do was to give up to the effect of that nasty substance. At this point, I could not see anything clearly, it all seemed to be very blurry to my eyes, and I decided to close them for good, saying one last time, in a hopeless, yet angry tone "Bastard…", he smirked, and left the room.

Due to the drug's effect, I started to drift away as my thoughts and body movements started being random and uncontrolled. I just could feel myself being pulled away as my last rational, conscious thoughts were _What is Sasuke up to, what does he want from me, from us? What… how… I… hu-hurry u-up… ple-ase… na-na… Naruto!!! _

To be honest, I feel pathetic. I mean, how is it that the head of Konoha's medic-nin unit has been beaten by a mere drug? How is it that the pupil of the Hokage herself was easily taken out of combat by a drug? Well, there's something I'm absolutely sure of, and that is that Tsunade-sama would yell at me for being so reckless, and she would nag me for months about this. "I'm so pathetic, I keep depending on other people to solve my problems, as always have been… as always will be, I'm a burden, I'm a load, everyone must think that of me", I say, as I float in darkness, a familiar darkness, knowing that nobody will hear me, or at least… hoping to. But between the darkness of my 'acid dream' I see someone strangely familiar to me, approaching surrounded by glowing dark-piecing light. I can just watch, as that glowing figure says "Hey, are you over saying those stupid nonsensical claims, girl?" My eyes grow wide open "You, you are… my other self!!!" as surprise is almost palpable in that moment. "Hey, I'm no such thing as your other self, but your 'Inner self'. Y'know, I run things down here, inside you, in order to keep everything… in order, actually." She said, goofy smiling.

Nothing could have turned things more awkward that they actually were by then, or so I thought; but since I was under a drug's effect, everything started seeming to be utterly logical, everything seemed to make perfect sense, like encountering with my Inner self, or being inside me, floating in darkness, or anything, so I did something to ensure (or at least try to do it) this was not an hallucination provoked by the substance, I asked "Ok, so, how do I know you are not fake, that you're not a mind-trick of sorts?". "What, how you even dare to doubt of my integrity?" she angrily replied, as fire was coming out of her eyes in an almost comical way. "Prove me wrong, sis, that way you'll change my mind because, maybe you're not aware of this, but I AM DRUGGED, and for all I know, you may not be real. So, give me a proof that you are real, that you are me" I said, testing her, also testing my level of sanity. Soon, I was going to regret that, as she started "Ok, you want a proof, I'll give you a proof of me, of our bond, of us", she continued "Yes, I know that the 'bastard' drugged you, after abducting us, that's why I brought you here, to reverse it, and to give you news".

My head was still spinning, even inside that 'inner self dimension', but if what she said was truth, the dizziness should be starting to fade out sometime, but something was unclear, though. "Come again, news you say… what kind of news?" I said slightly interested, when she replied in an annoyed tone "I'm not telling you until you believe me" noticed by her that I was still not buying what she told me, but the something happened that changed my mind "The headache, the dizziness… are gone" I said, wide-eyed, directly looking at her 'I-told-you' grin, a grin that reminded me of someone in particular, as a name slipped through my lips, delicately "Naruto…"; she reacted at the name, only smiling as she continued "Well, now that you believe me, I'll tell you about the news I have to you, that actually concern him." I admit that caught me off guard "Huh?"

Entirely confused, I asked "How, in which sense?", I mean, I know that he loves me and he cares a lot about my well-being and everything, just as I do about him, but, I'd like to know what is this news about. I was lost in thoughts, trying to find something, something that could be of vital importance for both of us.

Doubting I could find an answer to my question by myself, she decided to cut down my train of thoughts "Well, in fact that's the 'true' reason why I brought you". _True? _I was confused again. She continued "Yes, in fact, the drug doesn't react that fast, and you know it. So the reason why you fainted in seconds is that I consumed a huge amount of chakra to counter the drug, even when you didn't request it".

So, that didn't clear any of my doubts, that's why asked something that seemed logical "Well, you know this drug's effect as well as I do, and it is harmless, so why would I want to rush for a counter on it, using enormous quantities of chakra, that could lead to chakra depletion and maybe death?" My point of view sounded pretty logical. She growled and mumbled "Why don't you just get it, woman?" then she said with a more calmed voice "It is harmful and dangerous, you should know better than anyone under what conditions it is dangerous and why did I take the risk I took; for God's sake, you're a doctor… use your head, think, and take the hints, girl". That got me examining every possibility "Well yes, it can be dangerous, but just under a certain circumstance… OH SHIT" my eyes widened, she nodded and finished "Yup, pregnancy".

"So now you understand why did I do it?" She asked me, blushing slightly. "You did it for my… I mean, for our baby, but… how did this happen?". With a huge grin that instantly grew on her face as she giggled rolling her eyes to me, she said sarcastically "Well, you know, when a blond man and a pink-haired woman love each other, they entangle their bodies and rhythmically move as…" with a deep blush, and an almost ruby-red colored face, I interrupted "I mean, I know how, but I want to know, was I not careful, wasn't he careful, I mean, we were, weren't we?" I started to ask her frantically as my head began to spin around again and started to breath very fast, and done so, I hyperventilated, as her grin grew bigger and giggled in amusement at my nervousness to know how did it happen. But after a short time, the anxiety faded, as one, no, the most beautiful feelings filled me from top to bottom. Happiness, pure happiness, to know that I was carrying a child from the one I love the most. _My dear Fox._

After nearly four hours of running and panting all the way through the forest, I finally decide to stop; well, more than decided, I needed it, my whole body demanded, every zone of my body screamed to me pleading for rest, even for a little while. For an hour or so, I had decided against it since my loved one had been abducted by a friend, and under my nose it had happened, but this time I couldn't tell my body to hang on, nor my mind… I was way too exhausted to go on, as I heard a voice. "Rest kid, you won't last long if you intend to keep that pace, and even if you got there without resting, what do you think you could do in that beaten-up state of yours?" I knew he was right.

So I did what he suggested, I finally stopped running. As I did this, my limbs started to feel numb and my head started to feel heavy, my eyes started to close by their own, I surely didn't want to sleep, but again, the voice came in "Kid, you need to truly rest. Fear not, I'll fix up those wounds for ya, besides, I wish to talk to you for a sec".

Entering in a moisty room, that, if I can recall right, is the place where the Fox's imprisoned, I fill my head with thoughts and questions, questions that I know only he'll show up a good answer, or at least, one answer that I would want to hear, just as it has been for almost five years, when I started using him as some sort of a shrink, in a twisted sense; but even though, I feel it helped, since he is now more willing to help me out and even had shown traces of feelings, it feels funny… the fact that he grew a little bit softer; maybe it was that our 'sessions' opened his eyes to the fact that we were surrounded by loving and caring people that didn't care for what we were, but more for what we are now, or maybe he just didn't like the fact that during my depression I ate only like four times per week, and I was start looking like crap, and nearly out of this world, which by the way, would have coasted him his own very life, so he decided to cheer me up a little, to keep me alive. In the end, I think there were both. I sigh as I finally get in front of the cage where my 'prisoner' is being held, held down by a pair of doors with a paper tag written 'Seal' all over it. I start calling him, to talk.

Just at the moment I call him, I hear a growl, but not a raging one, it was more like a morning growl, _(just like MY kind of growl, which by the way, some pink-haired girl __under the name of a flower, totally loves_, but anyways, I ask him nervously "Hey Fox, what was that thing that you wanted to talk about a second ago?" a somewhat nervous tone coming out of my voice as I say those words, which he replies also nervously (_which frightens me_) " Uhm, Kid… ah, Damn, I knew this would turn out to be hard to say, but ah…" "What is it, dammit, is this information something that hard for me to swallow, that you just can't say it directly, is it?" I ask, annoyed, overtaken by anger and doubt, speaking out of insecurity. He lifts an eyebrow, as he says "Indeed, it is. For I don't want you to get 'nuclear' on me, not in a time like this, so close to retrieve them…" "Them?" I say hesitantly, not really knowing what he meant, which was unavoidable "Blast, I talked way too much, it means I have to tell you".

Noticing that what he is about to tell me is of vital importance, I do what any other normal people would; I ask, dry-mouthed and eye-widened "T-Tell m-me what, Fox?", only knowing that any answer he could possibly give was going to be a nuclear bomb… He sighs heavily "That your girl is pregnant". My eyes widen "Oh Shit" I faint…

_It's been a while since the brat's out of the village_, I think to myself as I sigh on the window watching snowflakes fall all over the Hidden Leaf, and watching my breath marking a little spot on the crystal, which turns white, like the color of my hair, or the color of a bottle I have right next to where I sit, which contains a beverage, that I pour into a tiny plate, and getting into my mouth, just like if that act would make me oblivious of everything happening in the world at the time being. I sigh again, ready to obscure my mind with alcohol, as I turn to grab the bottle, which was not in the desk I'm sitting anymore "Hey, not fair. You go buy your own stuff" I scold at someone, a radiant blond woman, physically in the middle of her twenties, but actually my age, which is… _man, I'm so drunk I don't even remember my age, but around 59 or so._ Eyes twitch as I point a finger on her, watching horrified that she was drinking all my Sake… IN ONE SINGLE GULP, but as soon as she finishes, she replies "Well, since I… am the Hokage, I can technically do it, and claim that I was saving your life, which would turn out to be a good deed, you pervy toad… Hic", 'slightly' drunken.

_N__othing good comes out of arguing with her, never_. Again, I think to myself as I ask Tsunade "Why are you awake this late, aren't you supposed to have a security meeting at first time tomorrow?", she just drops her head and sigh, while sitting on her 'Hokage-issue chair', replying "And what are you doing drinking in MY office this late", I felt darts on that last one as I said, in a playful tone "Touché". She giggles at the statement as she finally breaks the chit-chat with a serous question "Are you too… worried about those two?" Silence engulfs the office for half a minute. "Yes, are you insomniac about it too?" Another silence, broken only by her tears and her crying "Yes…".

More than ten minutes later, as I drift away in my own thoughts, I finally realize that she stopped crying, and fell asleep; she looked incredibly peaceful, although she's not, as if an angel had touched her just to let her out of her suffering even for one moment… my God, she looks so peaceful, so incapable of harming anyone '_Anyone, but me'_, so delicate, so beautiful… I caress her face and put away her golden locks off her face, to make her sleep a little bit more comfortable. "If you only knew what I feel…"

Quenching my thirst with another bottle of Sake that I 'just happened to have', I start to drift away in my thoughts once again, only to find my reasoning being blocked by unnecessary, stupid thoughts that just pop out, out of nowhere, for no apparent reason; which I try very hard to get out of my mind, by any mean possible, In my case, excessive alcohol ingest, that in any other time, at the rate I'm drinking, I would be knocked-out on the ground, mumbling nonsense, but this time, it doesn't seem to work.

Accepting the fact tat I'm 'stale', and that tonight my mind won't let me get rid of these stupid thoughts, I finally stop drinking. As I put aside the Sake bottle that I was quenching my thirst with, I see something that eases my mind _And my heart_ for a moment, a blissful moment. I see the moonlight bathing her beautiful face, forming shades under her delicate, soft fingers, which are over the desk she is sleeping on, I smile, blushing _Even though part of the blush is from the alcohol_. I can't help but to lift her in-between my arms, and take her out of the office, into her bedroom, which I have visited only once, until tonight. As we pass by a window, I whisper "It's still snowing".

Jiraiya, the good-old toad hermit, the one and only Ero-sennin, as the kid loves to call me, it is I; but apart from that, I'm other things, like a handful of mistakes, mistakes anyone would feel like crap if they have fallen into them, mistakes I don't want anyone else to suffer from, that's why I try to teach the kid so desperately, not only about making new Jutsus, but about life itself, hoping that he actually listens once in a while. But hey, I'm not just mistakes, I now realize it; I'm a lot more, and in this moment, a lot more means to me just one thing… _A man with something worth fighting for, like an apprentice, or a friend, or a village, or the love of his life…_ That's life as I can see by this moment, that's Me as I can see by this moment. When we finally get into her chamber, I lay her on the bed and cover her up. Then I sit on a chair, falling asleep, while mumbling "Tsunade…I… I… I love you, with everything I am, with everything I've got".

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So, did you like this second chapter guys? I really hope you did, because it took me a while to feel right about how to develop the situations, but at the end, I think it turned out right. By the way, other minor pairings will be revealed in later chapters, but some of them will not play major roles, unless the plot demands it to be that way.

But in this moment, the major pairings are (and will not change):

-NaruSaku

-JiraTsuna

Minor pairings may change if the story requires it, and will be revealed in later chapters.

So, stay tuned, and please, R&R. Your reviews mean the world to me.

See you in the next chapter. Take care.


	3. The morning after

Howdy, fellas, once again I apologize for being a late updater, but I have an excuse… I mean, a good reason why I couldn't update until now; and the reason is the following:

"I was about two weeks out on vacation and, even when I did find the time to write (which I did, and by the way, another idea popped into my head for another Fic, but we'll talk about it later on, ok?) I didn't find the time to type it on the computer. And man, I love the relaxing atmosphere of lakes, they're just… inspiring (that and the fact that I was reading a Jane Austin's book also) and beautiful. And this my beloved readers is my excuse for late updating… this time; maybe the next time I'll blame it on the fact that school started (God, have mercy upon us, school starts next Monday [August 13th and I feel I need another two weeks of vacation, minimum, but anyways, what the hell…) or a strange bowel disease or something, but never on my laziness, that would be… troublesome (sorry, bad pun)."

Again, if you feel a little confused on the How-to-read (that I hope not), here it is, how is it read:

- "Talking"

- "_Talking in the past"_

_- Thinking (past and present)_

Once again, I want to thank the following people for their **support** and **reviews**; guys, you mean the world to me, thanx so very much.

-Shiroihato: I told you, that you'd be the first one to know and man, that is saying something, let me tell you that by the time I told you the title, I didn't know more than you did about the next chapter (nah, just kidding… or am I?)

-Radon199: I was wondering too, but then I said "What the hell, if I can make at least 1 person happy with my story, I'm happy, but still, I'm glade that others like it as you did, and Thanks for the Review, looking forward to more reviews from you in the future.

-Uzumaki's Fire: Good review…

-Krymsom: Thanxs for R&R, I'm planning to update sooner the next time, or at least I'll try.

-Gnosismaster: Man, I'm a fan of yours, I'm glad you liked it, and I hope you keep up too.

-Mebla: Awesome review… XD

-Cherrtblossom279: Thanks for the review, and it was the first one I got… ever, so I'm forever grateful, thanxs so very much, hope you like the next chapter.

-Veritas15: Thanks man, and I hope you liked my Beta-ing, enjoy the next chapter.

-DaaNI-ChAn: Your story is not loosing it, I think that it will last as good as it has been until the very end, I believe in you, girl.

-Weixuan18: Just you wait until I send that PM, please, for it will contain a special surprise in honor of your B-day, Hymir's style, but no more clues until that day, 'kay?

-E-vay: Thanks for still liking my fic, I hope you like it 'til the bittersweet end.

-SakuNaruLover: Thanx so much, I hope you like this chapter.

And I want to make something clear also, related to the comment made by Faisalz : first, I want to thank you for your comment and for the constructive criticism (that is welcome and well accepted), but the thing is, that this story is written that way, in order for the reader to pay attention to the story, and for preventing skipping (that unfortunately, lots of readers use to do often), and it is written that way to add some suspense, sometimes, like… to make you wonder "who the hell is talking?", but later on, the identity of the character is revealed, if not by saying the name, by the description of the character or the situation that surrounds him or her. The other reason I write like that, is because… I just like to write like that, and because the greatest fics (and books) I've ever read, are written that way.

Once again, the good ol' disclaimer: I do not own the following: Naruto, by Masashi Kishimoto, nor Pita-ten by Koge Donbo, nor Monster by Naoki Urasawa, nor Saikano by Shin Takahashi (the mother of all angst mangas; really, a tear-shedding story all the way through, a must-read), nor Fullmetal Alchemist by Hiromu Arakawa; but I do own this: a PC to work on, a hell-lot of inspiration, hours and hours of music, and lots of spare time to read and write.

_**Chapter Three: The morning**__** after…**_

_**Have you ever**__** made yourself a promise? Have you ever shielded yourself from your own memories? Have you ever feared them? Have you ever made a mistake so big that could tear apart what you love the most? Have you ever made a vow?**_

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-Chapter Three- _"The morning after…"_

Several minutes after fainting and talking to the Fox, I wake up with a terrible headache that feels more like ONE terrible hangover _After all, these years of hanging out with __Ero-sennin have __made me more than a good ninja, and nowadays, each and every one of our reunions includes alcohol, well… we've grown up after all_. I try then toreincorporate by standing up and trying to maintain balance… failing terribly. I fall on the ground as hard as a log after being sawed by a lumberjack. After a few seconds Iadmit that my state is not very good _(Duh)_, at least not to go on… not today, but tomorrow morning, instead.I rest, being that the only thing to do by this time, so I decide to sleep, or at least try to, for even if I'm desperately trying to go on and find Her, my body is screaming and nothing can be done to fix that… if I don't rest first, so I decide to leave everything to the Fox. _I know that he will not hesitate on helping me, not when he knows the __very nature of the situation, so I can trust him… __that's for sure. _But in the meantime, I have to find a way to retrieve her, to keep safe, her and our baby… Good God, it's true, She's pregnant! I almost forgot it for a sec. Huh, I still cannot believe it, I'm about to be a father, if I could jump all around in excitement, I'd do it, but that would empty what's left of my energies, so I will jump around when I wake up. No, slash that, I will not do anything as such as distract myself with anything until I find them; the rat bastard, and My angel, my pink-haired angel, the very reason I live today, and the very reason why I will live many more years. "Kid, would you stop blabbing already? No wounds will heal unless you're full asleep, do you understand?" I heard the Fox's voice shouting at me in a parental way that reminded me of someone very dear to me. _Ob__aa-chan, what are you doing at this time, not drinking, I hope. And by the way, would Ero-sennin have told her yet what he wanted to tell Her? I hope so, they need it._

_I__ feel… warm. That's strange, since we're in the middle of winter, and winter in Konoha can be a rough one; plus, I remember that I fell asleep on a chair and… Oh, god. _"Nothing good comes out of sleeping like that you know? In fact, it could be very harmful for your body." I heard that Golden-haired goddess' voice speak those words, vaguely, as she sat in her bed, half covered. But the strangest thing was, that those words came out sounding different than they use to, another thing is, that she didn't intended to kill me right in the spot when she saw I was sleeping in her bedroom, but instead, she covered me up and got back to her bed, without making a sound. The entire room was left silent after what she said, only letting a surprised White-haired man sitting on a chair, covered up and a little bit blushed for the sight within his eyes.

Really, I have never felt this way before, I have never felt this… safe, this certain of my feelings. Now I remember why I love her so much. When I was a kid, I always needed someone I could feel safe with, but I was unlucky; everything seemed that I would never find that person, not in my whole life. That's why I grew up to be strong, only on my own, left alone by everyone, until I found Her, that's when my life really started. That's when my life met happiness, and sadness as well. It was the beginning.

I was the clown, the goofy character everybody laughed at, the dumb little pervert, I was that, and in the bottom, I'm still that, let's face it. But that was just a cover, nothing but a mask, and behind that mask, there was a doubtful, frightened child, whose father was a promiscuous and gambling bastard, while the mother was a vicious psycho with a very bad alcohol problem. Both of them were shinobi, and they only cared about two things, their vices and their job. So there's no doubt why did I turned out like this, eventually. Everybody underestimated me, nobody would give a nickel for me, nobody, but them. My team, the team that would become a legend, one everybody would know all over the world. But the team is not the point in this, but the people behind the team. My friend and foe, Orochimaru, which I think is the one that really understood me all along our way together, and unlike what people may think, I actually shed tears when I found out about his death, even when we were opposites, neither of us felt hatred against each other, but it was exactly the opposite, we felt respect, admiration and a sense of brotherhood _Although it was in a weird sense_. But out of that, he was one of my closest friends, someone that helped me grow to what I am now. But he wasn't the only one. There was this perverted old guy, too.

The sensei, as everybody called him, was actually, My sensei. He helped me in so many things all over my life, he earned my respect and trust, sure, but not before a whole lot of events that brought us close enough to make a bond between us, a bond that was higher than a Student-Teacher relationship, it was more of a Father-Son nature relationship, the kind of relationship that I never had with my biological father, and it wasn't just because he taught me how to be a good ninja, but he taught me how to be a good man, also. And for the record, he was more of a pervert than I am, but that's getting off-topic. The thing is that he is the second person who saw what was occulting behind that mask, but he never understood what was underneath my heart, though. The only one who did was Her, the princess, my princess.

Radiant, beautiful, divine, but stubborn as hell; even until today, I still think the same, and I think I will think the same until I meet my very end, someday far away. But until that moment reach me, I will do my best to keep her by my side, and to stay by her side as well. I swear I will. But I'll start where it all began, if I want to understand it all, if I want to understand why do I love her so much. And where did everything had it's beginning? In our childhood, of course, about forty and so years ago. It was a day like many others in Konoha back then, which means, a boring day for a child with no friends like me. My only amusement was to see the workers building all over the village, that was growing at a fast pace in comparison to other villages and cities, mainly for the fact that Konoha didn't use to stop building even in winter, but what caught my eye that day was no other than a girl, who shined like the sun, even when the sun itself wasn't visible that day, not even from the snowy hill I was sitting on.

This girl, however, was like, uhm… unreachable for a slob like me. I mean, I was just a kid like any other, only more troubled than others, that is. But still, there I was, astounded at what was in front of my eyes, those golden locks swaying with the wind, letting light pass through; her eyes, glittering like the moon under the starry sky; her nose, drawing perfectly the silhouette of her face; her mouth, letting go small breaths of mist with every exhaling of hers; and her body, moving gracefully as she danced in the hill, alone, yet accompanied by the always elegant snowflake falling, that seemed to be synchronized with her moves. It was like seeing an angel dance, celebrating life as if there was nothing more than happiness and beautitude in the world. I thought nothing could be better, until she saw me. I felt like if I was going to heaven.

So, in that moment, the only I did was… besides blushing, start moving like crazy, until I tripped on a rock and fell backwards on my butt, submerging in the thick layer of snow that was all over the place, maybe all over Konoha and even all over the Fire Country. But that didn't matter, what I really cared was that I was covered with snow, laying on my back in the ground… I felt so dumb. But then, I heard something that returned me to the earth, a soft giggle, that made me lift my head to see her beautiful eyes being closed as soft giggles abandoned her mouth, that was being covered by her hands, in a graceful movement. Everything was perfect, a smile appeared on me, driving the moment further, a moment I wished it lasted forever. Due to the amount of the snow over me, and the temperature of the place, I sneezed, which made her stop all the giggles to come out. As she approached to me, moving smoothly as the wind, all I could do was gulp, out of nervousness, as she took her purple scarf off her neck, doing something I would remember forever; she tied her scarf all over my neck, as she said a few words "It's freezing here, and I don't want you to get a cold, so why don't you go home and drink some hot beverage, I'm sure that should do well." After that, she helped me up, and continued her walk, disappearing within the falling snow.

God, since that day, I couldn't think of another girl but her. I swore I would dedicate my whole existence to her, to see her smiling like she did every day of my life. But I early found out that things wouldn't be that easy, that the world was much more complicated than that. Years later, on the day we graduated from the Academy, I was nearer to heaven, for they have left me in the same team as Her, I mean, how lucky could I be? Everything was going to be perfect, no mistakes, no slips, nothing that could interfere with us, I was sure she was going to be mine, and I was going to be hers. I was sure that everything would turn out the way I wanted to, I mean, everything should turn out that way, if the world was a fair place, for once. How wrong I was.

Quivering and hesitant, the next day after the graduation, I was willing to let her know my feelings for her, but she was behaving… weird. Very elusive, like avoiding me. I used every method possible to reach her, but it was worthless. After a while, she was still behaving like a stuck up brat, so my only reaction was to give her a nickname, an earned-by-own-hand nickname. I started calling her 'Princess', something that, obviously, made her mad at me. The only response I got was "You're annoying, Whitey-locks".

Confused and whatnot, angry; I only fought back… Big mistake, the first lesson I learned on life around Her, but sadly, not the last. As time went by, I started to doubt, not on how I felt about her, but on if I really should tell her what I felt. On that point, I knew everything was gonna be downhill, at least in the meantime of my confusion, so I rested my hopes on fate, waiting for things to turn out well… another mistake. As days went by and our 'relationship' grew worse, I started to think that my methods were resulting futile, as we started to tease an even insult each other, something that made me grow bolder, but in time, it bittered me a little. Things went this way mostly everyday, at every hour, and deciding between love and hate, I started do get tired, so I decided to give time some time, until we were grown ups, and more mature individuals… another big mistake, that would lead me to one of my darkest memories.

So, years passed; and fortunately, a bond was created between us, not exactly the bond I wanted but it was ok, there was trust, friendship, though there wasn't what I wanted… love. We were finally grown ups, we were finally mature enough to understand emotions such as pride, greed, love, hate and despair. Emotions that would nest into me eventually, and would lead me to make my biggest mistakes, and my biggest decisions. Everything started that night, I remember it was a rainy one; everything else is blurry to me, for what happened that night. That infamous night, one night I will never forget.

"Pointless, senseless war; it was stupid of ourselves to think that we could stop it, no matter how powerful we are" I said between sobs and shed tears. "I wish there was a way to bring him ba…" I continued, until I was interrupted by Orochimaru's cold, yet grievous voice "But there isn't, and you know that". I wanted to prove me right, by any means, only to see her smile, to prevent her from seeing what was inside this house, to prevent her from crying, to prevent her from knowing the awful truth, arrogant, how arrogant I was; trying to block the sun with my thumb, trying to live in a perfect world that didn't exist, because everytime my mind started to drift away, a roar inside my guts brought me back, and my vision led me to see the materialized truth of the imperfect world we are living in… Her brother's corpse, Nawaki's corpse, lying on the other room, motionless, cold, dead. The only thing that was missing was her presence, and while waiting for her to arrive, I feared, that I have made up my mind at last, that I was going to tell her, even if only to comfort her a little, even when I knew it was a mistake, even when I knew I was taking advantage of the situation, even when I knew what was about to come.

The time went by, as rain fell and mud started to fill the streets, I was getting more and more anxious, I was starting to breath heavily, heavily and fast paced, I couldn't reach tranquility, I couldn't stand it any longer, my heart started pounding and hurting, then she arrived. The moment I saw her silhouette in the door, illuminated by a lightning, my heart stopped, and my eyes widened out of fear… sorrow and fear. I tried to remain calmed and I opened my mouth, but no words came out, Orochimaru, seeing that, looked at me and calmly gave a slight nod, which silently meant 'Do it, whatever has to happen, will happen'. I only could say "Tsunade… Nawaki is, he is…" I couldn't continue, for my throat dried, and my lips wouldn't let a single sound escape anymore, as she stared at me, looking for any kind of hope, when tears started to fill her eyes and tiny sobs escaped from Her, between I could distinguish a simple word… 'No', as she shook her head, one side and another, not wanting to believe what have happened.

Letting go a deep breath she had just taken, she entered to the room, shaking on her own feet, fear running through her veins, it was so much that it was almost… palpable;

At the time she got into the room, I was going to enter with her, when a familiar hand stopped me, and gave me the wisest of advices "Let her go in by herself, she needs to see this alone, and she needs to get over it alone, as long as it might hurt us, it is the only way." There was something in Orochimaru's voice, something I should have listened to, but it was too late, I have made up my mind already, so I replied "Thanks, but I need to do this, I don't want her to go through this all by herself, I can't." His eyes widened a little in surprise, He had realized what I felt just by what I've just said, so he pulled out his hand, and gave me a final advice "Okay, but I warn you, be careful, you never know what you may come across with. I tell you this as a friend." I didn't understand what he said right away, but I felt I was going to remember it. The next thing I remember, was hearing a sound that torned my heart into a million pieces. It was her, it was "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!".

Preventing myself to cry for just hear her scream, I gather up all my strength and decide to go in with Her. I found her crying with all her might, tightening his lifeless body under her warm embrace, like trying got recover his soul from the afterworld just with her might, and her love. This sight hurt so much, so much that I couldn't take it; everything I wanted in that moment was to erase her pain, or at least to ease it. I couldn't take it anymore, so I lifted her and caught her in a tight embrace, almost without reasoning the act, just doing it. She returned the embrace, and held me tight as she was still crying "It hurts so much, and it hurts in here" touching her chest where the heart is located while saying the last part. I couldn't help but to start crying, too, and between sobs, I managed to say something "I know, mine has been hurting for a long time, and only you can kill the pain; I know maybe I cannot kill yours, but if there's something I can do to ease it, be sure that I will do it". She looked at me quizzically, and then she kissed me. That time, for first time in our lives, our lips entwined as branches of a couple of dying trees, trying to heal each other by sharing all what they've got. It was a long, sweet kiss.

Even when I knew where I was, and what had happened, I didn't care. I kissed Her as if there was nothing else on this world, and for a moment, I even believed it. But I saw… realized that this was not the place to be doing this, so we escaped, with tears in the eyes, trying to avoid reality, trying to escape the awful truth, not really believing everything that was happening; it was like if that kiss would have let us out of this world… if only for a moment, one blissful moment.

Under the sheath of tears and sorrow that was wrapping us, we still found something that could release ourselves, even if it was only for a brief lapse of time. I felt we were not part of this world anymore, I felt we were outsiders; as we rushed into the depths of the village, all I saw, houses, shops, monuments, everything was unfamiliar to me, I was suddenly in another dimension; everything was passing by in slow-motion, everything felt so unreal, everything but her figure. Although for me everything looked so vague, so false, so out of place, so like a dream, once I looked at her, being wrapped by my arms, everything became clear again, then, we got to her home, but to be more exact, we got to her chambers, via her window, what was about to happen would change my entire life, would change my entire way of seeing the world, so as for me, reality would change that night, and my world wouldn't be the same. I still remember the rain, falling and crashing on the window as our bodies fused as one in a sweet, yet sour kiss, as for the grief and sorrow of a lost life was with us that night, it was intertwining with the ultimate celebration of life, the maximum proof of love and trust one can give. That was the first time I was in her bedroom, that was the first time I demonstrated her how much I loved her. But even when the dawn came, it wasn't over, in fact, the morning after… was only the beginning.

Dozens of pigeons flew right by the window, chirping and flapping their wings as the first rays of light entered through the window, I still remember it, golden light bathing every single inch of the village, and every single inch of our bodies; I was awake already, embracing her with my arms as she slept peacefully, while I was caressing her pale humanity, making circles with my fingers over her delicate skin; I was just watching her as she slept, when I finally got to a decision: That I would, somewhere in the future, spend my days like this with Her, and only with Her. It was an oath to myself, and a promise to her.

I knew that in the moment I leave that place, I would be a new man, living in a new world, I knew it. But somehow, when I did, something felt just wrong, like that awful noise that you can hear coming out of your guts when you know something's out of place, yet I didn't know what was it… or I didn't want to know at least. If I could find what was it, only if something gave me a single clue, anything. The moment I stepped out the house, I heard a familiar voice, a voice that would have the answer, I just knew it, this person would have the right answer of what I felt, but instead, what I heard was not what I expected "Remorse", surprised, I replied "Come again?" not believing what I just heard. "Remorse is what you feel, Jiraiya, nothing else" Orochimaru reassured his words, sure of what he had just said, so he continued, instead of letting me process his words "You want to know why do you feel remorse, and I will tell you why. You feel this way because of what you did, for even when it turned out not to be something bad, you know you shouldn't have done it… at least not in a day like the past one". The only thing I could reply was "Why?", and as always, he came out with the right answer "Because you knew that you took advantage of the situation, but you are too stubborn to recognize it. Now, you may say that you did it because you were going to do it anyways because of what you feel, but you know you were too scared that She wouldn't return those feelings, at least not in a normal state of mind".

Pause… after what he said, there was a pause. Everything stopped, for I knew that he was right, I knew I was scared and I knew I had taken advantage of the situation, and finally, I knew that what I felt was remorse, indeed. He continued, as if what he had said wasn't enough "You feel bad for what you did. So what? Just because you zapped that very human impulse of yours and took the very first flower of her garden? That my friend, is natural, is human" he ended his statement with such a sarcastic tone of voice that made my blood freeze and my heart skip a beat.

Nothing hurt the most than knowing that this was her first time, but so was mine. But the thing is, that it was not the fact of being the first time, but the fact that I employed the situation to make it happen… I felt like a monster, I felt dirty, I felt horrified. I looked at my hands, wanting to see the filth coming out of them, contemplating carefully at what I just did, it felt so bad that it made me nauseous, so I grabbed my face and started to run without direction; meanwhile I started to cry, horrified at the events past. Weeks passed after that and I secluded myself, not talking to anybody, submerging into my parents' vices and falling into the bottom of the abyss.

Sadly, I became everything I always hated, everything I always promised I would not become; but then, in the midst of my despair and discomfort, I found something, I found something that could release me a little, something to ease the pain. I started to write in the middle of my isolation, to ease the tension, to get some of the things that tortured me out of my system. Amazingly, it worked, and I finally came back from my self-imposed exile to live again in this new world I have entered the morning after that

oathful night. After that, nothing was the same, at least not for me, for those memories would haunt me every single night from that moment on; so I decided one thing, as when I was a kid, I decided to give time some time, and for once, I was right; time heals all wounds. But between us, things changed, we had to grow up, and we did, that night… we grew up.

Losing all hope to get Her in my whole life, I decided to stop, but after a time, I realized I could not. So the only thing I could do was hide it, and it had worked well… until a few nights ago. I cannot hide it anymore, or it will burst out inside me, but I'm still scared, I'm still doubtful. Doubtful on how will She react when I tell her what I feel. But at the same time, as I said before, I have never feel this certain about my feelings, and if I don't lay them out right now, God knows that maybe I won't do it in my whole life. So that's it, I reached that conclusion, and I have nothing left to lose.

Clustering all my strength into my throat, I sigh, decided to say something I have kept inside me for a long time, something I have to say, something that will change my life, and regardless of the response I may get. I sigh once again, heavily, closing my eyes and getting ready to whatever it may come. "Is something wrong, Jiraiya? You look a little bit nervous. Tell me, what's on your mind?" Says the golden-haired goddess, looking me expectantly. As I gather all my strength to say what I'm about to say, I manage to take a deep breath, before I start "Tsunade… there's something very important I must tell you, something that has been within me for a long time, before even my absence of two and a half years with that dumb kid, hell, before even we parted ways as hermits, the thing is… that I don't know how to say it".

Quivering and blushing, I manage to finish the sentence that took a lifetime to make, but I don't happen to finish it right the way I wanted. So looking directly into her eyes, under my most serious tone, I open my mouth, but before I even say a word, she interrupts me, with tears on her eyes "I love you, Jiraiya, ever since that winter, ever since I gave you the purple scarf, and ever since our first time together" I was left dumbfounded, I didn't know what to say, I didn't know if I was supposed to even say something.

"Tsunade, how did you know I was going to say that?" I asked her, really surprised, but then as always, she managed to surprise me even more, when she said "I didn't, I just usually think about the worst case scenario, and that's my problem", I laughed at her comment "The worst case scenario? And what could that possibly be?". She started to cry, then I got worried "What's going on, why are you crying about? Is something wrong with you?", but her reply, was something I didn't expected "No, there's nothing wrong about me. But with you, the case is different" I was shocked "W-what, what are you saying?" I said expectantly, not really wanting to know what was wrong with me, but anyways, she was going to tell me, and She told me, indeed "It's your heart… you have a heart condition, and I don't know how to treat it". "Since when you are aware of this?" I asked, fearful and doubtful. "Since we were together that night, since the night I have waited to have, the night I wanted to give you my heart and my body. But out of fear, I didn't tell you about it; the truth is, that I got away from you for fear that you could die, like Nawaki, and that's the last thing I could ever wish to happen. That day, after I woke up, I was going to give you my necklace, the necklace that symbolizes my love, but when I realized that, the necklace had killed my brother, I decided not to give it to you, for fear. Fear to lose who I love the most. You were my first love, and I wanted you to be the last one, but how, if I cannot mend your heart, nor redeem myself for what I did to you".

Mending, that's a strange word… a word I don't usually hear from a doctor, but I know that what she wasn't really talking about my heart condition. Now everything seems clear to me, why did she got away, why did I got away, and why she didn't tell me that she loved me. Until now, that is.

"Disorder… a word that defines any condition that is not the normal one. It refers to the loss of balance within something's normal behavior. Those are words I heard a time ago from a prominent young doctor, whose ideas defied those of her teachers. That determination with her words, that sense of being right, that bravery. All of that seemed to have an effect in me, for I fell in love with that doctor… again. Now tell me, where's that defiant attitude of yours, the type of behavior that has always characterized your self, that made you who you are? The reason I say this is because now I know I have a disorder in my heart, but I will not give in, I will defy the situation until the very last consequences, because that's what you taught me, because that's the most important lesson you have ever gave me. But I will not fight if I'm not with you, with the One I'm in love with. For that, I make this vow: That I will be with you and for you from now on, and until the last of my days. Tsunade, would you marry me?"

"Yes, yes, a thousand times yes, I want to be with you until the last of my days too. I want to overcome whatever comes in our way, together. I love you so much Whitey-locks…"

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So that's it for the Third chapter, my beloved readers. You must know something, my dears, this was originally be part of another fic, an exclusive JiraTsuna fic, but I liked it so much that I decided to adapt it to "Winter", and I really feel it went up just right. I hope that you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

And there are two announcements I have to make, and both are important. First goes first. I just entered to the second year of Medicine at the University and as you may know (or imagine), this will absorb most of my time, and I will not be able to update sooner, but instead, I will keep updating at the same pace as I have (about once a month). And second, my life's about to change because of the fact that my grandpa (E-vay, you know who am I talking about) has been diagnosed with Metastasic Cancer and there's nothing that can be done anymore (at least not clinically speaking), so he's been given a life expectancy of maybe six to eight months. So this is going to affect me and my family very much, and for that, I beg you not to get very upset if I don't update soon. For your understanding, I thank you, a lot, see you on the Fourth chapter.

Another thing is, that not anyone of you has found the hidden song, which has been hidden in every chapter, and it will make it's last appearance on the next chapter. So you have like two more moths to guess which song is. And to help you, I will give you a part of the song, to see if you guess, but it is a translated part, to make it more fair, yet more difficult. The part of the song is the next, if you know the song, you will guess it right away:

"The skies may fall for all I care, for we have a world of our own".

So, that's it. Cheers, and celebrate life everyday, because you cannot take it for granted, and you donnot know when you can lose it. So cheers for the fact that we are alive.


	4. Thou shall not forgive

Aye-aye, maties. I'm in my pirate phase (too much reading One Piece, seeing Pirates of the Caribbean and playing The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker)

Again, if you feel a little confused on the How-to-read (that I hope not), here it is, how is it read:

- "Talking"

- "_Talking in the past"_

_- Thinking (past and present)_

Otherways, I want to thank the following person for her **support** and **reviews**; and I want to say something a well for her.

-DaaNI-ChAn: Hi girl, how are you doing? I hope you do just fine. And I hope you can read this before going to school, and have that Enormous Hiatus on fanfiction and stuff. So I would like that I have appreciated everything you have said and done to me and for me, I really do, from the heart. Thus, I want to dedicate this chapter to you, for you are one good friend that I don't want to lose, not from communication, nor from memory. That is why I want to dedicate this chapter specially to you. So you can go study having read a special dedicatory from, what I hope, you consider a good friend. Once again, thanks for everything.

Aye-aye, ye olde disclaimer, arrgh: I do not own the following: Naruto, by Masashi Kishimoto, nor Pita-ten by Koge Donbo, nor Monster by Naoki Urasawa, nor Saikano by Shin Takahashi (the mother of all angst mangas; really, a tear-shedding story all the way through; a must-read), nor Fullmetal Alchemist by Hiromu Arakawa; but I do own this: a PC to work on, a hell-lot of inspiration, hours and hours of music, and lots of spare time (not many of them lately) to read and write.

_**Chapter Four: Thou shall not forgive**_

_**Have you ever forgotten? **__**Have you ever tried to let everything go? Have you ever let emotions drive you? Have you ever feared them? Have you ever tried to kill your very self? Have you ever kept a promise? Have you ever forgiven?**_

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-Chapter Four- _"Thou shall not forgive"_

_N__aruto, that name is one that keeps me awake very often in cold nights; it is a name that makes me remember, that makes me feel, that makes me kill._

Uncertainty, it's something that has kept me thinking these years, that has made me consider every possible option, every possible scenario, every possible situation, bearable or not, logical or not, correct or not. But someone may ask _Consider about what? _SoI perhaps, and only perhaps, could answer that question, though even for this, uncertainty has a role, too. But I'll try my best, anyways. What I have considered, thought, viewed and reviewed, once and again, is about this, about something that has bothered me every time before we meet. _I feel like saying it out loud, even when nobody will hear, even when these words will never come out of these cold and moisty walls_ "What will happen the next time we see our faces, brother? What will happen the next time we rendezvous? What can possibly happen?"

Violent, unstable, insane. That and many other ways I have been called over time, by so many people _Even though not many of them have survived my _"_insanity"__, so I stopped being self-conscious about it after a while, and after about a hundred corpses._ But there was someone, someone that called me that, even knowing what could happen afterwards, even after having seen what would happen afterwards; that actually made an impact on me, that actually got to my nearly-destroyed, nearly-rotten heart. I will never forget Her… I will never forget her hair, her scent, her figure, her attitude about life, her soul, her glasses… those tiny details that made her be… Her. Those little details that made me go back from darkness, that made me think that there was actually hope for me in this world, other than to think of me as an avenger, when I was only being a scavenger. Yes, those little details that made me know what love is about, even if only for once in my life.

Meticulous, a little obsessive; but decided, as no one I've seen before _Except maybe for somebody, somebody I consider my brother_, rebellious, carefree, intense _In every single sense of the word_. Observant, decisive, straight-forward, hot-head, dozens of words come rushing to my mind that could describe her, every one of them correct, every one of them true; but the only words that make me really, really remember every part of her self are… loving, kind, warm.

Despite of her premature departure, induced by… unfortunate events that I would rather forget sometimes, I still feel the same way about Her, the same way I did on the day we first met, on the day I first knew the real significance of the word "love". That glorious day, that ray of light in-between darkness, since I was with the _Snake_ by that time I still remember that day like if it happened yesterday, but I like it when I wake up remembering it, that way it feels like a dream, or a vision of paradise, at least for me.

Long were the nights that followed her departure, long were the days that filled me with grief, long were the hours I spent on sorrow for her loss, but… longer were the seconds that I spent exhumating her corpse, and all was for a simple wish, a simple promise we made, a simple oath we took, the both of us, in unison, yet only one of us would comply. After that encounter with my brother, right after I took away his life, when everything started to look brighter, I felt it; a void-like feeling gathering in my guts, sign that something was going wrong… awfully wrong. Curse the heavens that I'm never wrong when I feel that sensation, like if someone has put that burden on me, as a curse; in the past I would have wondered _Why?_, but now, for the life I have chosen to myself, I donnot ask that question anymore, now I even think I deserve it. Yet, She didn't have to carry that curse as well, dammit! She had nothing to do with it, but still, she paid the price, the price of being… an Uchiha.

No sounds were made after my brother, Uchiha Itachi, stopped breathing. It was all silent, the only sound resonating was the sound of hi blood spilling all over the onix-color ground, that took that color after being scorched once and again, by the means of my power, by the means of the avenger's fire. I finally did it, I finally completed one of my goals in life, and for the first time in quite a long time, my face drew a smile, a genuine smile, made out of relief, but stained with sorrow, for he was my bloodline brother, in the end. But then, the sensation struck me… I was paralyzed, I knew exactly what had just happened, and then, I heard it; and ever since that day, I still hear that sound, and as much as I try to hide it, I'm afraid of it, to the point that I feel terrified for the sole fact of hearing it. That dreaded sound, the one that still echoes in my head… is her scream, her last sign of life, filled with agony and pain. I couldn't help but to cry in that moment, even if I had to hide it when I confronted the killer; my 'brother', that blonde dumbass… Uzumaki Naruto.

Going through a moment of agony, rage and other feelings that there were being mixed-up, I managed to control myself, if only for a moment, to see with my own red eyes, the awful truth. I used my Sharingan, in order to see what had happened in that place… bad idea. When I saw that scene, with Her, being ripped from her insides with the force of the Demon Fox, I was terrified, tears were gathering within my eyes, but that wasn't all, no; he said something, and then he ripped her heart, still beating, out of her body in a raging rampage. I screamed and covered my eyes, weeping from sorrow, crying from anger, wanting to take my own life right there even when it meant losing after all I have passed the last years. But there was no time to take the easy road, I was an avenger, and I was about to do the only thing suitable for me, the only thing I have learned to do… take revenge. So I decided to face him, ready to take my revenge; it would be sweet… yet sour.

Not even one minute after her death, he arrived to the place where I was; he is swift as the wind, I must recognize. He faced me, his eyes slitted in red and his teeth incredibly sharped as knives, ready to enter into me at the first sight of provoking. But my revenge would not include fighting, at least not that night, no; my revenge would be much more worse than just physical damage. I intended to leave a scar in the hardest place to heal, his soul. Until I assured that he wouldn't attack, I didn't move, hiding my face in the robes I wore; half hiding my anger, half hiding my sorrow. That worked out pretty well, neither of us was moving, not an inch; not until I decided otherwise, for I knew it was already my time, that the situation was under my control. Then entered the avenger, and that is how we all ended up in this situation. That is how we all ended up being under the strings, strings that I manipulate at will, strings that I have been manipulating for some time now, strings that manipulate even Akatsuki.

Leaving the place that night, I waited for them, for the team of Konoha to leave the place, so I could start another phase of my plan, but not before doing something utterly important to me, that was, to see her again… one last time, to fulfill my oath, to comply with the promise that was sacred to us. When they finally left, after nearly forty minutes of waiting, it started to rain, and it rained in a tempest manner; hn… suitable for the occasion. I returned to that place, and entered to the place at where Her remainings lied, under a soft layer of soil, stained with blood (from Her), and tears (from Him). I stared at the place for a minute, and I started digging.

Panting and sweating, I managed to get to where he body was, and for my surprise, when I got to her, I saw her with her heart on her hands but yet smirking, obviously not a fake, for that was the smirk that I learned to love, the smirk that almost got me out of the dark side of my own self. Yet again, it couldn't; I rather think that this is fate, that this is destiny, otherwise I would collapse on myself, no matter how strong I might be.

Tears rolled all over my face; silent drops of salty water, that fell to the ground, and fell on her face, illuminating it. In that moment I knew it, that this place fell under the description of the place we wanted to end, so I couldn't remove her off the ground, instead the only thing I did was to thank her for being with me, for loving me and for giving me the illusion of being alive again… even if only for a moment. I kissed her lips, and caressed her belly, the place where our son was, and I cried again, silently, without even changing the expression of my face. This was one thing that my sensei, Orochimaru, had told me long ago; suddenly, I remembered other things he thought me.

In the time I spent living with him, I learned so many things; and not everything was about fighting, but about life too. Even though I hated him for being what he was, nothing changes that he was wise as well. He and I used to talk over dinner, discussing mostly about life; but our discussions were not the usual discussions people visualize as normal, no; our discussions were single words, thrown towards the air, apparently aiming at nothing in particular, and we rarely formed long sentences,

I, personally, enjoyed this. Our words were concrete, solid, straight to the point, and when we managed to form a sentence, it meant it was something of extremely vital importance. The most important thing that he ever said to me was once, during our midnight meal, just after a spar, when he had injured me with a razor-sharped kunai. I didn't do anything about it; never took any sort of retaliation, just continued sparring like if nothing had happened to me, being strong, being nothing but the way he taught me to be. I had done everything by-the-book, everything the way he did. Still, he was unpleased. During this meal, he said something over my behavior, reprehending me with few words, but then he said this "Sasuke, the number one rule about being an avenger is the following: 'No matter what, under any circumstance, avenger… Thou shall not forgive'; never, ever let anything go. If there's something I have learned over the years, is that". Those words made such an impact in me, that I decided I would follow that rule for the rest of my life.

Done with this thinking and remembering, I feel I'm not alone _I mean, literally_, and I just happen to know the cause of that, and it is that something, or someone else, other than me is here. As I open my eyes, they turn blood-red, making themselves all-seeing orbits of which, no one can escape, even if this someone has entered into my mind, cleverly when I was unguarded. And I only know of one person in here who can do that… "Or am I wrong… Sakura?".

"Only one mistake you made, woman." I say as she replies, nervously "I know, eavesdropping. Damn, I got to admit that you don't oversee anything. But you too, surely made a mistake…" I have to admit that this commentary caught me off-guard, so, the only wise thing to do is ask "And what is that mistake I made?" "You confused me with someone else, because… I am not Sakura" I see her clearly, I feel her presence, and even then she's telling me otherwise, this must be a farce under which I have fallen, some kind of psychological game she got me trapped into… or maybe, and just maybe there is something else I ignore. But then I recognized it, what she said was not a lie, but it was not the truth _properly speaking_. "So, may I know who am I talking to?" Once again showing no weak spots, I asked her; yet again, she replied with the same confidence "You are talking to Her protector, and now I know everything I needed to know. As easy as coming down to your 'lair', sneak into your fragile, little head, and get the info I wanted. Just like that." I was surprise indeed, but not too much to make a wrong move. I answered, clapping my hands in a congratulating, sarcastic manner "Clever indeed, this new jutsu of yours is very… interesting." And then, she interrupted "Jutsu?" doing that kind of question left me dumbfounded and confused, and as a reflex, I could do nothing but to ask _once again_ "Then… what are you?" She smirked…

(otro invierno más)

_T__his just doesn't make sense, what… what is She?_ "What is this? Your blood pressure is rising, your eye movement is increasing too; you're staring to sweat. Under all those layers of calmness and coldness, you are only a scare, little child, thinking _What is She?_, or do I lie?." What she said terrified me, she can even read my thoughts, I mean, my _real_ thoughts, not the layer of them that I use to confuse enemies.

My best shot is to think carefully, or everything could fall to pieces. "Everything what?" She asks, Once again, cornering me in again, leaving me no choice else than to talk without before thinking, and let my emotions drive me, no matter what could possibly happen… something I learned form my 'brother', Naruto. "Be careful with what you think, and don't EVER even think His name again, because you don't have the right to; after all he did for you…" Angrily, she replied "Everything, like killing my wife. Well excuse me if I misunderstood that, but I didn't asked Him to do that." Now my emotions were taking the lead, as intended.

"Sure, so I assume that you know why did he do it, right?" She answered with a question, and I shot back "No, and you know what? I don't even care. The fact is, after all said and done, that she is the ONLY one dead." And that answer left her shocked "Only one? What about your child?" I smirked, and started to laugh, seemingly frantic, enjoying what I was about so say next "So, You didn't wonder why haven't I mentioned my son yet? I thought that, by now, you would have known that He is part of my vendetta, as well." She seemed terrified, and nervously, she replied "You monster, how could you… do something like this to your own son? How could you use him as a tool for your vengeance? How could you…?" I interrupter her in that moment, changing my laughter for anger.

"…Take away a part of my own soul and give it to him in order to keep him alive, waiting for the moment to give him a hope? Call me monster if you want to but, under no circumstance, think that I don't consider Him a human. He will be part of my vengeance, indeed, but at the same time, he is the only thing I have left from Her, from Karin… my only love." I said furiously, almost yelling.

Maintaining a fixed, quizzical look over me, she replied "A hope… and a part of your vengeance? Does this mean that…" Once again, I interrupted her, as I entered somewhere I shouldn't have entered, for it could ruin my plans "… This means nothing, only vengeance… only revenge". I could only look away, as I knew I have committed a mistake, a big one.

Cursing my damn idiocy, I tried to pull out something that could amend what I just said _Even if only to myself_, something that made me once again, a monster. So, under the pressure I was and the nervousness I had, I could only come up with this "Now, if you excuse me; I have a vengeance to work on so… Go away. Go run back to your little, fragile body… before it's too late. 'Sharingan'". I drove her out of my head, and of my thoughts, only to see that, indeed, she was not as she appeared to be; she was not Sakura, but a specular image of her… only a mirror of herself. She was Her, but another side of Her, a side that represents some things she don't show often, she was a little bit more visceral, more impulsive, more like… Naruto, just a little bit darker, though.

This 'driving her out of my mind' left her exposed and vulnerable, so I gave her a little advice "You should run, you know? Or else… bad things could happen" I, under a layer of false security, said. And fortunately, she disappeared indeed, but not before saying something "Whatever you are planning, I will not let you do it, even if it costs me everything". And then… she disappeared, leaving a man; his face covered by shadows, but still, a smirk on his face was visible.

_C__onsidering what he said, He's up to something BIG, I just cannot figure out what is it, nor I know why did he slipped up, I mean, being like he is. Cha… _"All I can do now is run back to my body, to Her… dammit; if only I had read him better" I said, as I was getting closer to my body, or more exactly, to my little 'Outer Self's' body. As I reached the place were she laid unconscious, I let out a sigh that denoted so many things… unconfidence, anxiety, nervousness, or maybe just tiredness and an awful need to digest what I have just heard from him. After a little concentration, I finally manage to get a hold of myself, and re-enter to my body, just to find a still-unconscious Outer Sakura. I do the wisest thing I could do at the moment… I close my eyes and start to think about everything I heard back there, trying to find out something, no matter how small, that could possibly give me some sort of hint of what's he up to.

_Y__ells and noise_ That's how I would describe what was inside his mind, if not for a little piece of calm, that should represent his wife, and…GOD, I know what he is going to do, I know what's the final step of his revenge, the final step that he was blabbing about. The only thing I hope is to have the strength to do what is necessary when the time comes. I really hope I do, for Her sake; no, for their sake… for (Outer) Sakura and for the baby, our baby.

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Author's note: Hi there, got some news over here. First, I wanted to apologize for being this late on updating, but I just couldn't do it earlier, you must know that last 23rd, my grandfather passed away, and I haven't had the possibility (or the will, nor the inspiration) to write anything, So This chapter is dedicated to him, to my grandad. May you rest in peace, I will never forget you.

Second, I wanted to apologize for this chapter being so short, but as I said before, I got a major block, but don't worry, I won't stop writing, nor reading. Plus, I have been writing about other things lately, and drawing really hard, add that to the fact that have an Immunology exam the day after tomorrow, and I'm starting to hate the freakin' PMN cells, lymphocytes, CD markers and respiratory burst. But worry not, I will update sooner next time (I hope so, at least).

Bye, take care and don't forget to review. Thanks for you support.


	5. Dark Masterpiece

Aye-aye, maties

Once again, here I am… and this time is personal. Hahaha I always wanted to say that; but now, seriously, at last I have got some time to catch up with my story (hurray for that) and I will try to keep writing in any spare time I get from now on (although I cannot promise anything, but what the hell…), so I can finish this story for good, but don't worry, there are still a few chapters to go, so this will not end up very quickly, but at the right time, that I can promise.

Again, if you feel a little confused on the How-to-read (that I hope not), here it is, how is it read:

- "Talking"

- "_Talking in the past"_

_- Thinking (past and present)_

Anyways, I want to thank everyone of you for your **support** and **reviews**.

Aye-aye, ye olde disclaimer, arrgh: I do not own the following: Naruto, by Masashi Kishimoto, nor Pita-ten by Koge Donbo, nor Monster by Naoki Urasawa, nor Saikano by Shin Takahashi (the mother of all angst mangas; really, a tear-shedding story all the way through, a must-read), nor Fullmetal Alchemist by Hiromu Arakawa; but I do own this: a PC to work on, not so much inspiration these days but enough to go on, hours and hours of music, and (not so much this time) spare time to read and write.

_**Chapter Five: Dark Masterpiece**_

_**Have you ever felt despair? Have you ever faced death? Have you ever felt something restraining you from your own self? Have you ever confronted your own conscience? Have you ever seen the end draw near? Have you ever collapsed onto yourself? Have you ever tried to hang on to fate, no matter the odds?**_

-Chapter Five- _"Dark Masterpiece"_

This is, in the end, what makes us decide to start the journey, to follow the road, even when there isn't any, and to go on no matter what the odds are, to go on until there is nothing left to do, or no one else to fight. You may ask what's that _It _that I'm talking about, and I will gladly respond to that. That _It_ is the end of the trip, the goal, the final door in the hallway or whatever you may call it; for me, that goal is to reach the quarters of Akatsuki, and rescue the love of my life… I don't care what the cost is, I don't care if I have to kill to reach her, I don't care if I have to give up my life for her to keep on living. I don't care if I have to fall from grace to do what I have to, what it needs to be done… I don't care.

"Today is the day" Those are my only thoughts as I approach to their headquarters, but my interest rests not in fighting them, but only to retrieve her safe and sound, even if I have to suffer Hell in order to do that. As I reach the main gate of the quarter compound, I start to breathe faster than usual, sensing that something's just rotten, that something's just not right, like… out of place. But just before I manage to reach the very entrance, two shady figures appear in front of me, willing to negate me the entrance to the compound, willing to fight me. I cannot see their faces clearly, but I just don't care anymore, for they have been recruiting so many under the premise that we have eliminated each one of them as they appear, that I just can't remember who is with Akatsuki these days. As I don't want to retard my encounter with destiny _Or with Sakura and Sasuke to be specific_, I kick these two figures out of my way, blowing them into a cloud of dust and a world of pain, for whoever they are. As I sprint directly to the entrance, I hear something the chills my spine and makes me stop in the spot.

"Naruto-kun, as rushy as always, aren't we?" My only reaction is to turn my head around, quiet and slowly, breathing fast and steady, as I am terrified for what occupied those words, or more precisely, who. "IT cannot be, Orochimaru? You were supposed to be dead, long dead" But what he said next terrified me even more than I could have imagined "Oh, but I AM dead, aren't we Itachi?" I could only respond in one way "Uchiha Itachi? What the hell's going on here?" To that, Itachi replied as he came out of the dust cloud, with his characteristic monotone and lack of feelings "My brother, he is a brilliant man; cruel, but brilliant".

Lost in my dumbfoundness, I don't seem to believe what my eyes are showing me _Just like in everything in the past years, nevertheless_ and as a child, fear and other emotions fill my body and my heart, sending me automatically into a world of desperation, but as suddenly as it came, a ray of light and hope reaches me, as I hear the whispering of the one I seek… the one I love. The fear is now gone.

Doubting, I stop from any movement, just to prove if what I heard was real or just another delusion provoked by anxiety. "Naruto" I hear again, my heart tells me everything I needed to know, it tells me that the voice is not an illusion, and it tells me that she's near. There's no time to lose, not even with these reanimated joke-making corpses, so I decide to put some shadows to fight them and run. But as I do it, I start to feel that even though I run, the ground below me remains still, a dog-breath friend would say "Oldest trick in the book, huh" I didn't realize that, accidentally, my eyes have crossed Itachi's when I summoned my shadows to nail them in the ground again, where they belong. "So, is this the power of the Mangekyou Sharingan of a dead man? I have to say that, wether it's more powerful coming from a living being, or you are just weak". I knew I wasn't gonna make him loose it, but I had to show some confidence, or else I'd be killed. "Don't get too cocky, fox-boy, that we are just about to begin" Once again, that annoying laugh from the snake trying to drive me mad.

"Everything in this universe is under my control, Naruto-kun. And now you will experiment what it means to live Hell on your own flesh." Itachi was sure of his words, which sounded like nails in a blackboard, but that was his worst error, to overestimate himself and to underestimate me. So I struggled to move and to get the hell out of his illusion, trying to get loose to defend myself, but apparently my efforts were futile _It seems that I tend to commit the same error as him_. He remained expressionless as he told me "Your resistance is futile, donnot try to escape your fate, but embrace it" Then he stood up for his words… I really experienced a living Hell, but suddenly, a new whisper got to me "Naruto, help me…" I'd had it with this guys, they were annoying and her voice was one of real desperation, her voice was calling for help… my help, and I would not let her down.

Itachi kept attacking alongside with Orochimaru, stabbing me and submerging me in a world of pure and raw pain, but Sakura needed me, so I decided that if no struggle of mine would let me loose of this illusion, I'd call for a 'little backup'. "Giving up already, Naruto?" A monotonal voice asked me, while another vicious one stated "Our attacks are strong, so strong that you'll never get rid of the pain" I just laughed, as something awoke from inside of me "Indeed, your insistent attacking is strong and painful, buy MY WILL IS GREATER" A great roaring pushed them back as a pair of tails managed to break the dimension by extracting the energy in the universe itself and making a dimensional rift to get me out. "Itachi, He's getting out, stop him!!" An angry Orochimaru screamed as a red-eyed Itachi started to look as if he had seen the devil himself. "What is wrong Itachi?" A question which answer petrified both, a question which answer no one but me could answer "He's lost control of this dimension, and now, he's as strong as a wounded pup; but don't worry, you won't be let alone, one of my friends will accompany you until the end of time in this alternate dimension" Their expression was one of pure horror, as one of the tails fusioned with the rift, forming a being that was to be feared in every universe it stepped foot. The fox asked me "What, you're not staying for a little fun?" "No, I have better things to do, and a couple of lives to save." I answered, steady in my statement. "Ok, then. Suit yourself." Finally, I got out of that dimension, and as I closed the portal, it vanished never to be seen again, never to be opened and never to be remembered. Now my path was open and my only goal was to retrieve my one and only love, my cherry blossom.

In the shadows, a single minute appears to be an eternity; in the shadows, what we see perceive as real seems just like a blurry illusion; in the shadows, madness is nothing but a way to survive; in the shadows, we think of none but ourselves. But once you have been totally consumed by darkness, it becomes comfortable, vague memories come form time to time of distant days, memories of so many people already gone… you start to see ghosts, hear them, feel them, until unconsciously and involuntarily you become one of them, nothing and only but a living ghoul, a stray soul, a phantom. But right now, does these things enter into an area of importance, or do they really and actually matter? No, what is important is the present, for I need to be precise now, if I want to forge a perfect reality for myself in the future. But it's not just for me that I want this level of perfection. There is someone else, the only being that I hold affection to, not just for the fact that remembers me of a person long gone, no, but also for the fact that it is the last trace of my footsteps on this earth… the last evidence of my existence, the last evidence left that shows that I, once, had a soul; but no more.

_I once had a soul, I once had a soul, no more_ I keep repeating to myself as I make all the necessary arrangements for the ritual yet to be celebrated. As I get nearer to the room where she lies, unconscious, steps begin to slow down and the distance between the door and me seems to be growing each passing moment; virtually I stop, even though I have the will to move forth, but something is delaying my arrival; and I know that it is not something exterior, it's not her inside power, no; it is something within me, something warm, something I haven't felt since… a long time ago. But suddenly, anger creates a void that encircles that sensation and leads me back to that comfortable darkness; in an instant, I can move again, the angered face is substituted by my accustomed smirk; rotting doors, moisty walls, silken strings clinging on the walls, freezing water falling drop by drop in a well-maintained cadence and cold sweat running all the way through my body, not leaving a single spot free; everything is in the right place, at the right time. 'Tis time to begin, 'tis time to get things over at last, 'tis time for vengeance, 'tis time to perform my dark masterpiece.

"Secluded in a corpse, the seeded earth lies waiting against Father Heaven's will, waiting unwillingly the arrival of the pouring black hail which contains the ending remnants of the undead, restrained only by the pit of serpents." Those are the words I pronounced as I moved my hands making signs in a fast, yet maintained pace, were the triggers to begin the ritual, as the liar glowed purple, letting black snakes form a bed that took her from her actual position and leading her to the canter of the catacomb, where fate was awaiting for us, the five of us.

Closing the doors after the snakes let her inside the huge, dark room, I disposed myself to seal the entrance from any kind of intruder that could interrupt the events at bay; again, with another sequence of hand signs followed by nothing but an increasing hissing and a flow of serpents that seemed to appear out of the blue _For the common eye_. Thus, giving me some kind of secureness, still, I feel uneasy. I feel something's about to come, and I feel it in my gut.

Each and everyone of the black snakes that have carried her all the way through her chamber to this great hall started to form in the shape of a symbol as I commanded them to do so using hand signs and words that no man but me could understand and pronounce _At least no man in the last years_. Then, the snakes' hissing, sweet lullaby started to be heard as the living symbols on the floor started to glow crimson, creating a field around her that emanated a form of energy which I was familiarized, yet I haven't feel it in quite a long time; it was a form of energy that only emanates from women, or more to be precise, from a seeded womb. I summoned a snake to bring me the last of the elements needed to complete my vendetta, casually, the most important of all… the spiritual chamber where my son's unborn figure lies suspended. So fragile, so innocent, so like Karin, so like me, so perfect.

Contemplating my son's body in the chamber made me realize that soon, everything would be over and that, by the time anyone could notice, I would be laughing in awe as I saw myself the winner. The final movement was just about to come… introducing my son into her, imbued with my will, in order to kill Their son, and

emmiting an curse that would leave her unable to carry another child in her lifetime. It was genius, it was glorious, it was… about to be materialized. I could see it, after what it felt like a lifetime, I could see it; my job was almost complete. "Where is one, there can be two; although, any place submerged in darkness shall not be occupied by light. Thus, light shall be devoured by darkness." Those were my last words as I contemplated the symbols on the ground move violently, surrounding my son's body and introducing him into her womb in what could be described as a frantic dance of light and sounds. Then silence, I have won, everything else was just a matter of time, nothing could be undone… at least, not that I knew. I could finally savor the sweet taste of vengeance…

Yearning for the encounter with my love, I can hardly await to see her, as suddenly, something struck me, leaving me speechless and breathless for more than one second. I was paralyzed. "D-Did you feel it, too?" I asked the Fox; scared, almost crying, as a firstborn. He was hesitant for a moment, but finally he replied "Yes, I could feel it, something has happened right below us, like two floors or so. It was a fluctuation in energies, it was turbulent, it was violent… and I have an ill feeling about it so, you better start running, with my help…" As a red glitter surrounded me in a moment, furious and ominous, the Fox growled some words that I knew He would use only in extremely desperate times "Ok, boy… this is it. Here goes nothing"; from this point, anything can happen. And for the first time, not even the Fox knows how could this turn out…

Quotes and phrases that I heard before reappeared before my face, buried in my silken hands, where long and pink locks hanged freely surrendered under dominance of gravity… or whatever force of nature controlled this Inner 'world'. I was thinking _Not very clearly, but still thinking: what could I do?_

Everything was out of any possible control right now: my outer self was unconscious _Even to this realm_, another life was introduced into us, and above all, it was threating our baby's life. I was not sure where to begin. Ending was drawing near, and no possible solution was to be seen whatsoever. Everything was chaos, I don't know what to do… so I cry, just like a defenseless, little pup, left on the road in the middle of a snowstorm.

Minding on every single scenario I could think of, things would go wrong at some point and lead to disaster _Which means death to her, or worse, to our child and to Sasuke's child, too. I mean, it was not his fault to have been used merely as a weapon to accomplish a selfish goal and I would not make him suffer a terrible fate because of his father's madness, no. But if I wanted to save us all, I had to think, and fast._ It was there, suddenly. The right answer I have been looking for, as clear as the sky… but I knew then that I couldn't save us all.

Decisions like this are not presented every single day in life; even though, we must be ready to make them. Because it is in function of things like this that the course

of our lives change drastically, may it be for good or not. At the end, all we have due to this decisions is self-accomplishment, or regret. But the choice I'm about to make, cannot contain a trace of regret, and I hope, nor do sorrow. Sacrifice is the only way…

Hi guys. I know what you may think: Hasn't this guy taken already too much time to submit a new chap? Well, I have, but I couldn't do it earlier because… of many things, out here in the world beyond the keyboard. Not really bad things (not all of them), but maybe because of the fact tha I have been terribly busy in the last months. I am deeply sorry to keep you waiting like this, but I promise that I won't do it again (at least not for this long).

With this good news (the fact that I submitted a new chapter), comes along a bad one… This story is about to end. NO, it is not for the fact that I got bored or something, but it is for the fact that I planned to do so since the beginning, and to extend the story would screw it up big time. Further information in the next chapter, when? I don't know, but soon.


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